December 01,1999
First day
of the last month of this year... And an early one too... Thoughts about you
my love this early morning... How lucky I am to have you in my life and how
strongly I want to keep you with me... Such good feelings I feel within... Because
of your presence, because of your existence... I have to be thankful to have
met you... I am thankful for your love towards me and hope I can give you as
much as I receive... I love you... XXXXXX
Everytime
you tell me that, I get such a wonderful feeling inside. You have no idea. I
suppose I need to hear it often because I can't believe that it is real. Sometimes
I feel it's all a dream. Especially during the week when I go about my life
without your physical presence. You are always on my mind. Then when I see you
and you hold me in your arms, there is no other feeling like it. You give me
more than enough, in every way.
December 06, 1999
The Koran
says " He deserves Paradise who makes his companions laugh." If laughter
is the music of life then our souls are swaying in a dance to that music in
Paradise. All day today I walked with a spring in my step and tonight, by brush
flew across the canvas, forgetting time and the students taking advantage of
my euphoric mood. I am still floating, basking in the wonderful way I feel right
now because of you. Your laughter still echoes in my heart and I will hear it
forever and remember it often with such fondness, letting it fill me up carrying
my soul to that place called Bliss. I feel so fortunate to be able to draw from
this well of happiness. It was your birthday and I was the one that received
the best gift. Thank you Darling for such a precious gift. XXXXX
December 08, 1999
Here I
am again, early and aching from the battle with sleep... Another of "those"
days... But I am not complaining, at least not too much LOL... Laughter is indeed
good medicine for about anything... I like to laugh... Life can be so serious
that I always try to compensate by making fun of everything... Some of my childhood
that never left me... It is so much more fun to have found someone that likes
to laugh with me... It puts fuel on the fire O:-)... A joke a day keeps the
doctor away, humm I think I got that one wrong LOL... But who cares... Frankly
my dear, I don't give a damn... Well, time for me to get on the move... I will
be thinking of you as usual, as always, and I like it... Have a super day sweetie
XXXXX...
December 14, 1999
Oh the
horrors of being without the computer! Almost a week!!!! My house has never
been so clean. LOL. There are three kinds of death in this world. There's heart
death, there's brain death, and there's being off the network, but only because
I was not able to "connect" to you each night. Gheeze I missed that.
And I especially missed weaving dreams in cyber space. So to be, or not to be,
those are the parameters. One picture is worth a 128K of words.... What boots
up, must come down.......and if at first you don't succeed, call it Version
1.01. I'll be with you soon..... 3 1/2 more days....... then it's byte by byte
Darling. Thanks for helping me get re-programmed LOL . XXXXXXXXX
December 17, 1999
Here I
am again. Today was the day. Nice raise. Finally!! Eventhough today does make
an "8" and in numerology it has never been anything for me but fadic.
Maybe my luck is changing huh? I am counting the hours Sweet Pea. 15-. It has
been such a hectic week and I am looking forward to cooking for you that lasagne,
sitting back in the candlight with a drink or two or three or four or five,
some nice romantic music, with the Russians and the Romans.Maybe even a nice
scented steamy bath thrown in for fun. I did pick up, from the Body Shop, some
wonderful massage oil called "Sensual", because that's how I am feeling.
I'm almost tempted to arrive naked under my coat. *BG*. What would you think
about that huh? LOL I'm off my love... so many things left to do. Anticipating
being with you again Darling. Love, Cel. XXXXXX
December 23, 1999
Holiday
vacation has started... I am excited about the Flash project for work... I know
it drives me away from LB but you know me... Techy challenge is what makes me
crazy and going... I will be looking forward to your visit and will most surely
involve you in this... I need your good talent... Together we make such a pair
for those things... And above all it is always a load of fun... Be prepared
my love to get dragged into animation... I really want to outdo this and I want
you with me for that... Gheeze I am in a roaring mood LOL... I love you XXXXXXX
December 25, 1999
. Christmas
is more than trees and twinkling lights, more than toys and gifts and baubles
of a hundred varieties. It is love. It is the love for family and all mankind.
It is love for each other. It reaches out beyond our power to comprehend. It
is magnificent and beautiful. Christmas is also peace. It is the peace which
comforts, which sustains, which blesses all who accept it throughout the world.
Tonight I baked hand painted Christmas cookies with my children. We went through
old photo albums, old family recipe books, talked about past Christmas EVEnings
we have shared over the years. To me that is what Christmas is all about. To
be with loved ones. Moz.... you were so on my mind. I wished so much that we
could be together to share these wonderful moments. Next Christmas my Darling........
next Christmas...................
Here Is My Christmas Gift To You
May you always have an angel by your side watching out for you in all the things you do. Finding ways for your wishes and dreams to take you to beautiful places. Giving you happiness that is as certain as the sun. Giving you the strength of serenity as your guide. May you always have love and comfort and courage. And may you always have an angel by your side. Someone there to catch you if you fall. Encouraging your dreams. Inspiring your happiness. Holding your hand and helping you through it all. In all of our days, our lives are always changing. Tears come along as well as smiles. Along the roads you travel, may the miles be a thousand times more lovely than lonely. May they give you the kind of Christmas gifts that never, ever end: Like my love. May you have rainbows after every storm and may you have hopes to keep you warm. But most of all.................
May you always have an angel by your side.
December 25, 1999
Thank you
my Love for such a wonderful gift... Your words are soothing medicine for a
sad heart... Yes sad because I have overestimated its capacity to withstand
my very first Christmas alone... I could not be with you and the children were
on their own... I thought everything would be OK, but it did not exactly turned
out that way... I had this heart to remind me of the situation and to ache for
presence... The face I put up can no longer stand and now my heart is leaking...
Time will mend this wound as it always does and your gift is the right medicine
to kill the pain O:-).
I have no fancy stuff to give you, no HTML nor Flash... I have no expensive gift, no diamond nor gold to give you... I take this poor wounded heart and hand it to you... I know that your hands will take special good care of it as they have always O:-) XXX... I am not whole when not with you... I bless your love for me and still feel that I am fortunate to be able to love you... Carry my heart with you, it is the only place I want it to be... XXX
December 26, 1999
Yesterday
was your first and last Christmas alone. I promise you and you know I keep my
promises. It's a dreadful consequence of separation and of having a love who
doesn't live close by.. But it has passed and now a new one is on it's way.
See, the way I look at it.. not good to look at what's lost but what has been
gained. What was the trade off? We have one of the most extraordinary loves
we've ever known.Yes Christmas was different. Your kids, my kids (although almost
all grown up) but next year, we will be together in my new apartment on Dec
25th where the Christmas spirit will lift our hearts together and sing of love
not lonliness. And then together we will jump in the car and go to your apartment
and continue that spirit there. Never again will you be alone for Christmas.
I am coming today to see you instead of tomorrow. You need me and I will be
there, turkey and all.. I can't fix yesterday and it hurts me that you were
hurting. I tried to be with you as much as I could, here on our comps as I suspected
as much. We are so alike in so many ways and I would have been feeling the same.
But I have spent many "botched" Christmasses and I truly look forward
to Christmas 2000. It will be my first in a very long time, where I will be
completely happy and this is what I want for you too my Darling. Put the champagne
in the fridge......... O:-))) XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
December 31, 1999
Here I am on New Year`s
Eve. It`s 1:45 am and I can`t believe this is the last day of 1999. You are
sleeping in the other room and it gives me such a wonderful warm feeling inside
to have you so close. I will be joining you in a few minutes and will snuggle
up to your warm body. mmmmmmmmm It`s hard to believe we have reached this point
together. I have to pinch myself to see if I`m dreaming. It`s been day by day.
Many baby steps taken. And all in a comfortable direction at a comfortable pace.
And I can say with all my heart that`s it`s been nothing but bliss. You are
the most incredible man I have ever met in my life. You`re warm, sensitive and
kind. You`re romantic, intelligent, thoughtful.and caring and patient.. You`re
a wonderful father and a great cook too. You`re fun to be with and more than
that..... fun to love. You have filled my life with so much happiness, that
words escape me, and fail me once again, and I find it hard to write down all
the feelings I have for you. As we enter the new Millennium together, my only
wish, for both of us, is more of the same.
I see my night owl was
busy while I was dancing with angels O:-) ... The words you have written are
the same I would use to express my feelings sweet love... Truly there are no
right words... It is not something you can put into words... What we have can
only be lived... When you live it, you are happy, deeply happy... Happy in heart,
in mind and in body... Is it not a good definition of Bliss ?... You bring me
Bliss... Our love is Bliss... This week is very special to me since I have been
swimming every day in a sea of love with the waters warmed by your presence...
I look at you and I am happy... I listen to your voice and I am happy... I feel
your arms around me and I am happy... I sense your closeness every moment and
am happy in all those moments... I love you and I am happy... I feel your love
and I am happy... I feel your love and I am grateful... I love you so much...
May this new year bring us more of what the previous one has granted us with...
May all the years ahead of us be as full of our love as the past one has been...
XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
