AUGUST - MY FAVOURITE MONTH OF THE YEAR

O:-)

August 13th, 2000

As you know the journal is a place for me to come when things are not right in my world or when things are super right. The last entry was quite a long time ago because I have not had a need to come here. I suppose when I don't come here at all it's because everything is stable and I'm just plain ole happy. The holidays we spent together were truly blissful. It's incredible to me that I have found the perfect man for me. I have to pinch myself sometimes to see if I am dreaming. Today was a special day - you jumped into your car after lunch and drove all the way here to spend the afternoon and evening with me to help me get through the blues. It was a most wonderful surprise and it made me love you even more. How is that possible? I don't know. it just keeps growing and growing. I woke up with that "missing you" sadness and vrooooooooom here you were in my world and in my arms. Thank you Darling.... I will never forget all the things you do for my spirit. You truly are a special man. XXXXXXXXXXX

August 14th, 2000

Here it is Monday night. The office is slowly getting back to order. Can't say the same for my finances though LOL. Oh well.... c'est la vie right? It was rather interesting to go back into the journal one year from tonight. Journals are fun in that regard. It is history that has come and gone. It's a gauge to see where you have come from and how the choices you made affect how you live today. Many many changes for me. But the one constant has been your love and support Mozart. I am truly blessed. There are /have been many hurdles crossed and many triumphs. Tonight though, I feel like everything is out of whack. The planets, the chakras, the stars too. There is turmoil inside of me and it's whirling around my heart trying to make me dizzy. I feel drained and I need to find some strength to pull myself out of it. It's that runaway feeling again. But I never did that you know. I stand up to whatever forces are against me, and being born in the year of the dragon, breathe fire. Things will straighten themselves out. Time is man's angel right?

Saturday, August 26th, 2000

Here I am in 3R again this weekend. I do love it here. It really is my second home. You did a wonderful job on your painting this morning. You really are a fun student with lots of talent. I am extremely proud of you. I guess today you needed to sleep off whatever is on your mind. I was getting a little lonely and I ended up in our site surfing our pages, and finally in the journal. I copied this..... ``At times it seems like a fantasy, the love we share, you and me. I lay awake at night thinking of you, and where our love will bring us to. I strongly know and believe in my heart, that no matter what, we will never be apart. It's so rare and special, the bond that keeps us bound, the love that we have found. With every day our love is new, and this is my way of saying I Love You. `` Do you remember these words?? You wrote them to me last year. Well, I just want you to know that I love you more now as time goes by. With each passing day, it is still strong and growing. I know you`ve had a lot on your mind lately. As long as you`re happy Mozart......... that`s all that matters. If you`re happy, then I'm happy too . XXXXXXXXXXXXX So sleeeeeeeeep my da rling..... I will be here when you wake up. O:-)

Saturday, August 26th, 2000

Yes I remember... They are still true... I feel the same now as before... I am sorry for all the sleeping I did... The way I deal with some of life's events is such... The only event worth this sleep is the recent news about your daughter... I am deeply saddened and it has affected me profoundly... I wish with all my heart that everything will go well... I have come to a point where all that concerns you and your family is of great concern to me also... I love you so much... Please be patient with me XXXXXXXXXX O:-)

Tuesday, August 29th, 2000

Well..... my darling....... I didn't expect to find your heartprints in here LOL Nice little surprise. XXXXXXXXX Please don't apologize for being you. I love who you are. I am extremely proud of you and your struggle to "find" yourself as painful as it is sometimes I know. It's a journey that not many bother to take. My little butterfly has just inched out a little more from the cocoon. We all handle our emotions differently. I will not shield you from certain sadnesses of my life's events, and I will not carry you when you can't walk anymore. But I will stand beside you, help you up, extend my hand and be there to help and support you. I will encourage you every step of the way my little butterfly. Yes I'll be patient. Yes I am patient. I only wish I could do more. I wish I could have done more. Just don't stop talking to me. It helps me to understand and give you what you need. O:-) I love you that much. O:-)

TIME CAPSULE